Private lives

I feel ancient. I remember when a Tory vice girl story was a thing of joy and wonder, a hose full of snigger juice soused across the news. “Aha!” you could chortle back in the days of section 28 and Back To Basics, “They love to govern our bedrooms, but they’re not so straight themselves!” And then you could giggle yourself into a mildly-satirical frenzy, and maybe climax with a joke about oranges. Innocent, undemanding days.

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